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Sunday, April 22, 2007

I Light My Light

I've been trying to learn about myself. To discover. To ponder deeper. To reflect.

All in the effort and will to live a free live. To live a life free from perceptions, expectations, cultural or just rules governing the society. (I am not so good in expressing myself in words but I am sure you get what I mean)

I want to live like I want to.

I want to eat what I like, when I like. Instead of depending on where my colleagues would like to go for lunch today.

I want to read under the sun back at the balcony. Instead of worrying what neighbours might say.

I dress in big red as I feel like. Instead of worrying I might be laughed at for looking like a clown.

I dance to the beat like no ones watching me. Instead of worrying that I look like a jumping lunatic.

I want sing to the world. And I will sing it eventhough it may sound bad. (Reaaally bad!!!)

I call a friend when I feel like. Instead of worrying that she might feel like talking to me.

I take an ice cream while walking at the park. Instead of worrying about my extras. (Am strong believer in exercising)

I say sorry I am not up to party tonite cuz I am tired. Instead of draggin my feet there just for the sake of going.

But its certainly not something easy. It is difficult not because others is stopping me but my deepest self. Yes, the inner voice. Sometimes the voice is unsure, sometimes the voice hesitate, sometimes the voice shy away.

It is all about the way of living. And its a life long learning experience.

Don't get me wrong, I am not into criminology nor terrorism :) Nor is it about living a life discarding responsibilities.

I can't wait till I am there! I can imagine the exhilaration of living which is already pulsating in me while I am learning this skill of 'free living'.

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